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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28493667">Rebuilding Trust</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsWhovian/pseuds/MrsWhovian'>MrsWhovian</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Who (2005)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Episode: Revolution of the Daleks, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, TW: Nightmares, TW: Panic Attacks, Yaz and The Doctor Talk</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 04:27:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,573</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28493667</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsWhovian/pseuds/MrsWhovian</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Yaz and the Doctor need to talk.  The Doctor needs to regain Yaz's trust, but Yaz just wants to sleep.  Post-ep for Revolution of the Daleks.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>110</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Rebuilding Trust</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was the look that Graham gave the Doctor as he left that stuck in her head.  The look that said, “Yaz is not okay.”  He looked worried, and Yaz, well, Yaz looked exhausted.  The Doctor had an idea of how hurt Yaz was when she saw her again, and the first thing Yaz did was shove her.  And when the Doctor said that she wouldn’t disappear again, but Yaz said with such finality that she would?  Yeah, the Doctor was concerned.</p>
<p>Her worry didn’t ease at all after Graham and Ryan had left the TARDIS for the last time.  She was upset, and she wanted to talk to Yaz about everything:  what she had found out about her hidden lives, what Yaz had been through while she was away, and everything else in between.  But, just as she opened her mouth to ask Yaz to talk to her, Yaz just shook her head, and muttered something about needing to sleep.</p>
<p>- - - - - - - - - - - - - </p>
<p>The Doctor decided to just potter around in the console room for a bit; there were numerous system updates that needed doing from the last ten months.  So she set that going, then grabbed a custard cream and sat down, as she considered how to get her friendship with Yaz back on track.</p>
<p>Yaz usually kept her emotions pretty close to her chest.  She only mentioned something personal when it was necessary for the situation that they happened to be in at the time.  So her sudden outburst when the Doctor landed in Graham’s living room was unusual.  Out of character.</p>
<p>The Doctor always felt closest to Yaz out of the three of them, and she knew that Yaz almost idolised her in the past; something that her ego liked, although she never let herself indulge too much.  She needed to prove to Yaz that she could be relied on; trusted even.  Because the Doctor did leave people behind, and from the way that Yaz had been talking, she figured that Jack must have said something that caused her to put her guard up again.</p>
<p>Yaz didn’t trust easily.  She had been hurt and let down too many times.</p>
<p>- - - - - - - - - - - - - </p>
<p> A few hours later, the Doctor was doing the circuit around the central column in the console room, still deep in thought, when she heard a shout.  Immediately, she started running towards Yaz’s room, pushing open the door.</p>
<p>Yaz, still fully dressed, was tossing and turning in bed, the covers pushed down to her feet, as she was held in the grips of a nightmare.</p>
<p>
  <i>“She isn’t dead!  You have to help me look for her!  Don’t go!  Don’t leave me!  Please, I need her!  She can’t be dead!  Don’t give up on her!”</i>
</p>
<p>The Doctor perched on the edge of the bed and gently nudged Yaz’s shoulder, hoping the ease her out of the nightmare.  The thrashing seemed to get less violent, and the shouts turned to mutters.</p>
<p>
  <i>“I’m not tired Graham.  I’ve only been here a week.  I need to find a way to save her.  No, she isn’t dead.  I’m not hungry.  I don’t want to sleep.  I need to find a way back.  She isn’t dead.  She ISN’T dead.  SHE ISN’T DEAD SHE ISN’T DEAD SHE ISN’T DEAD SHE CAN’T BE DEAD NO NO NO NO…”</i>
</p>
<p>By now the Doctor was shaking her, calling her name, doing everything she could, but Yaz wouldn’t wake up.  So the Doctor took the next step, and lay down on top of Yaz, being careful not to trap her limbs, but letting her know that she wasn’t alone.  After a minute or so the shouting stopped, but instead her breathing started becoming uneven.  The Doctor immediately got up and took her position at the edge of the bed again, and held Yaz’s hand in hers.</p>
<p>“It’s okay Yaz, I’m here,” she reassured her friend.</p>
<p>Yaz’s eyes flew open, but her breathing was still shallow.  Yaz pulled her hand free from the Doctor’s gentle grasp, clambered off the bed, and curled up in the corner of the room, her breaths getting shorter and raspier by the second.</p>
<p>“I need you to try and take some slower breaths for me Yaz,” the Doctor tried to coach her, but Yaz shook her head and muttered in between gasps that she couldn’t.</p>
<p>“You can Yaz, I know you can,” the Doctor reassured her.  “And do you know how I know?  Because you are Yasmin Khan.  You’ve fought for me for the last ten months and you haven’t given up.  And I know that you are angry with me right now, and I am not going to tell you not to be.  That would be unfair.  But you are strong.  You can do this.  Try and slow your breathing Yaz.”</p>
<p>But Yaz just couldn’t catch her breath, not even when the Doctor held Yaz’s hand to her chest, the Doctor’s double heartbeat strong against her fingertips.  The Doctor could only watch as the words that Yaz could manage to utter became more incoherent, until eventually she passed out, slumping forward into the Doctor’s waiting arms.</p>
<p>- - - - - - - - - - - - - </p>
<p>
  <i>“It’s okay Yaz, I’ve got you, you’re safe.”</i>
</p>
<p>As Yaz drifted back into consciousness, she could feel a hand stroking her head.  Her head seemed to be resting on something soft, while she could also feel the TARDIS floor underneath her body.</p>
<p>As Yaz opened her eyes, she looked up to see the Doctor looking down at her.  Somehow, she had ended up on the floor, her head resting on the Doctor’s lap, the Doctor talking gently to her.</p>
<p>“What happened?” Yaz asked groggily, struggling to sit up straight.</p>
<p>The Doctor helped her lean back against the wall, before giving her a custard cream, muttering something about blood sugar levels, before asking Yaz what she remembered.</p>
<p>“The guys left, and I went to bed, then I vaguely remember dreaming something?” Yaz said, a questioning tone to her voice.</p>
<p>“Yeah,” the Doctor confirmed.  “You were shouting and thrashing around, and I tried to nudge you awake, and when that didn’t work I lay on top of you, but although that seemed to stop the shouting, you started hyperventilating instead.  You woke up, but I think you had been dreaming about me being gone, so when you opened your eyes and saw me, I’m guessing that your brain couldn’t put the two together, and you had a massive panic attack.  You couldn’t slow your breathing down, and you passed out, and, well, yeah.  Here we are.”</p>
<p>Yaz felt her cheeks flush in embarrassment.  Both at the fact that she had a panic attack, and that she was shouting things for the Doctor to hear.</p>
<p>“What did I say?” Yaz asked cautiously.</p>
<p>“You started off shouting that I wasn’t dead, and that you needed help to find me,” the Doctor started, loosely holding Yaz’s hand in hers.  “Then, you seemed to be having a conversation with Graham, telling him that you didn’t need to eat or sleep.  Then you cycled back again to shouting that I couldn’t be dead.  Then the panic attack took hold.”  The Doctor paused, taking in the exhaustion in Yaz’s face, before asking hesitantly, “What happened while I was away?”</p>
<p>Yaz looked down at their joined hands, as a tear dropped on to her cheek.</p>
<p>“I set up base in the TARDIS that you sent us back in,” she explained.  “I was sure that there was a way to find you.  Graham and Ryan tried to help, but they started easing back into life on Earth.  I guess I was in denial.  Eventually, their contributions were less to do with finding you, and more to do with trying to get me to eat or sleep.  But I could barely do either until I knew that you were safe.”</p>
<p>“I’m so sorry, Yaz,” the Doctor said, tightening her grip on Yaz’s hand.  “I honestly tried to get back to you straight after you landed.  And from what you said earlier, I’m guessing that you and Jack had a conversation about leaving?”  At Yaz’s confirmation, the Doctor sighed, before continuing.  “And, in a way, he is right.  Quite often my friends don’t get to choose when they leave.  Or how they leave.  Travelling with me is dangerous; you know that by now.  But I always try to keep you safe, and I’m so sorry that I’ve put you through so much.”</p>
<p>“I know,” Yaz whispered.  “I just needed you these last ten months.”</p>
<p>“I needed you too,” the Doctor muttered back.</p>
<p>As the two women slowly got to their feet, Yaz wobbled slightly.  The Doctor reached out to steady her, but instinctively pulled Yaz into a tight hug, and couldn’t help but feel relieved when Yaz wrapped her hands around the Doctor’s back just as tightly.</p>
<p>“I’m so tired,” Yaz finally admitted, as their holds loosened on each other.</p>
<p>“I know,” the Doctor replied.  “I’ll leave you to rest.”</p>
<p>“Please don’t leave me again,” Yaz said without thinking.  “Sorry, I don’t mean ‘again’ in that sense.  I don’t know why I said it.”</p>
<p>But the Doctor was already unlacing her boots and taking off her coat.</p>
<p>“It’s okay Yaz,” the Doctor said as she curled up behind her friend, wrapping her arms around Yaz’s waist.  “I’m right here.”</p>
<p>- - - - - - - - - - - - - </p>
<p>Maybe their relationship wasn’t completely fixed, but as the two women slept soundly, the Doctor pressed against Yaz’s back, they knew that they were halfway there.</p>
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